Gauging The Walker

My time here in Green Park is winding down, and apparently I am not the only one trying to fit everything to get the most out of my time here.

Today Vandana challenged me to stand with the walker rather than the parallel bars. I barely had the chance to utter how another patient just tried it for the first time and the why-can't-I whining when she softly smiles and says that it was going to be a surprise for me to try it.

Well, I am glad that I tried it... but I am not sure that it is my new favorite thing to do around here. I am excited, however, to have yet another mountain to climb (as if I needed one). Standing in my calipers surrounded by the comfort of steel that the parallel bars provide has become a safe haven for me without introduction. Having invited the loosely trusted younger brother of those bars over for a little stroll posed for quite an obstacle for me. I was no longer surrounded by what I had grown to know so well for walking, but rather I was now clinched on to two tiny pieces of flimsy metal with wheels on the base and nothing to catch my fall.

It was Vandana's intention not to have me walk with the walker but just to stand to gauge a new goal once my gait had improved. She explained to me that until this happens there is no reason to practice poor steps, which I entirely agree. So for probably the first time since I have been here, I obeyed delightfully and stood with white knuckles embracing the walker.

Although it wasn't long before Dr. Shroff could sniff out my fear and offer an additional challenge. Dr. Shroff is famous for the way that she can always slide in a more difficult task with the grace and beauty of snowfall. She invited me to walk a few steps with the walker while encased amongst the parallel bars. She figured that my fear would be fooled and that I would perform beyond the expectation. This is partly true. My fear of structural simplicity was eased, thanks to Dr. Shroff; however, my gait was still pretty wobbly. I really do benefit from both sides of the spectrum: being pushed to my limit by such a powerful force but also to have the rationality and wisdom to do only what I can do the right way. There is no need to practice foolishly.

Work hard and shoot for those things that are grueling and uncomfortable, but keep in mind that it rarely beneficial to step beyond the weight of your own 2 feet (particularly if those feet tend to have a mind of their own).

On a side note, I will be having my very last procedure tomorrow at Gautam Nagar. Dr. Ashish tells me that this is going to be quite an intense one in terms of the quantity of cells and the location of placement. I look forward to it, for every moment here has been a crucial stone in the path of healing and discovery. This particular stone, however, does not have internet access. Consider yourself forewarned.